So, have you begun to embrace your fetish yet? Still having difficulty understanding the nature of all that is considered Fetish?
Well, let me help you… I’ve compiled a list of definitions to help you identify your likings …err.. fetishes…, and to help you on your journey towards unleashing your ideals of sexy.
So, what is Sexy to you? Do you get turned on by touching or feeling something of the material nature? I’m talking about leather chaps, furry hand-cuffs, feather boas, rubber body suits, lace, latex, silk. If so, you have what is called a media fetish… Or maybe you get all tingle-ey inside when you see stiletto heels, knee-high boots, and sexy lingerie? Then you have a form fetish… And for those you who have a love for all that is human, body parts and flesh such as manicured feet, sexy hair, muscular buns, and taut breasts, then you fall into our third category of lovers of animate fetishes.
Remember, people can turn just about anything into a fetish. There are different degrees of fetishism that go from mild to extreme, your fetish may be a combination punch of the three types mentioned above or maybe be a simple fetish represented by one thing.
Ok, so all of the aforementioned things are hot and sexy but not your cup of tea? So, you’re into more of a sexy lifestyle that moves beyond objects, textures and body parts… Well, besides the typical object fetishes, there are also sexual preferences that are considered to be kinky fetishistic acts.
Sado-Masochism, or S&M: This is the practice of bondage and discipline where the sadist gets pleasure from placing others into submission, humiliation and/or by inflicting pain. Their partners are the masochists, the ones who receive the punishment, the whippings and the spankings, bowing to their servant, so to speak. There are many levels of SM sex play, and should always be consensual.
Exhibitionism. Exhibitionists get off by displaying their private parts in public
generally to an unwilling audience. Do you do this or like this? If so, be careful. The turn on is generally non- consensual and can be psychologically harmful to an unsuspecting victim. You can find pro-social ways of expressing the exhibitionist in you. Role-play and fantasy play with your consensual partner can be just as exciting.
Voyeurism. Do you get turned on by watching someone else? Viewing porn is a common form of voyeurism that is socially acceptable.
Swinging & Group Sex. So you like three-somes (mènage à trios) or group sex/orgies? Cool. This just means you like variety and there is nothing wrong with that.
Your kinky-fetish loving self needs to have your needs met, and what’s wrong with indulging in a little pleasure? Just remember if you're hurting yourself or hurting others, seek professional help. Otherwise, hat off, err…I mean leather chaps off!
Just remember that this doesn’t mean you have to air all the kinky details of your fetish to anyone. It merely means acceptance within yourself, and communicating with your partner, if that applies. Second, you must remember that role-play and incorporating fantasy must always be mutual and consensual. If your fetish is interfering with your relationships, your life, or hurting others you should seek the help of a professional.
To Get More Satisfaction out of your Relationships and Sex Life
Visit Mou Wilson, A Los Angeles Sex Therapist at Los Angeles Sex Therapy
